Friday, March 3, 2017

COFFEE TALK: BOY'S INSECURITIES OF OUR OWN LOOKS


Before I even proceed to typing out a post on this subject on hand, I would like to say that in no way am I trying to say that I am very good looking or whatsoever. Alright? I am writing this post because there seem to be quite a number of Instagram followers, who are very young and often shown signs of insecurities whenever they private message me on the platform. 

And I hope that I can address this "issue" to them. 

The issue that we are looking at are insecurities that many teenagers face today, especially in such an open world where almost everything is transparent. Everyone is showing off their life to others on social media platforms. More than often not, we tend to get jealous of the life that others are living, and I am no exception too. 

The main insecurity that teenagers face today tend to be about aesthetic looks. In my case, a lot of my followers comment that "You are so handsome" or "I wish I can be as good looking as you" etc. and they tend to show signs of sadness and envious of me. The truth is, there is NOTHING to be envious of, because from my own personal experience, we will all develop to be fine young men at the end of the day!


Going through puberty is a very shitty stage for many of us, and it is no exception for me. Through puberty, the hormones in our body start to change and many 'developments' start to take place. The most troubling issue for me during my puberty was that I began to develop a lot of pimples, resulting in some scars on my face because I would be so tempted to squeeze them! 

The picture of me in spectacles was how I looked like for the most of my life. I felt so inferior to many other classmates or school mate. I am generally a shy person, until you get to know me better as a person and when I am more comfortable with the company. Back in my secondary school and JC days, I felt inferior to a lot of other boys because they are either very good looking, display a lot of swag in their attitude, or both. I was none. Really. 

Of course, it did not help much that I was very active on social media back then, and was determined in carving a name for myself in the social media industry. Of course, that received a lot of backlash because a lot of people think that I am very attention-seeking, even up till today. Definitely not helping me overcoming my insecurities. 

I continued to think that I would never be able to break away from the image I once had. Non-Fashionable, nerdy looking and never ever going to be the guy that people talk about in the positive light. 

Then came army...


A lot of people always comment that army is a very bad period for us guys because of all the trainings, our facial skin will suffer a lot. We will end up with severe breakouts and oily skin etc. I do not represent the majority or anyone, but in fact, army has improved my skin condition by a lot! 

I really think that it has got to do with the fact that, we are always exercising on a regular basis, we eat proper meals on time, consistently hydrating ourselves (because army made us conduct water parades throughout the day) and we sleep early (everyday at around 10pm) too! If you think about it, these are the exact same routine that people always encourage us to do so, in order to improve our skin condition - sleeping early, eating well, exercising regularly and drinking lots of water. 

So, I would really like to acknowledge that army has contributed a lot extent to my improved facial skin condition. 


Every since army, I guess I tend to look slightly better than before (still with my awkward social presence in front of others). Of course, that also comes with additional effort after army. When I grow older over the years, I tend to look after myself much more by looking out for skincare products that might benefit my skin or for beauty purposes. Vanity creeps in naturally as you grow older, trust me boys. 


I have no great advices for you boys because ultimately, I think that puberty and facing with our own insecurities is something that all of us have to deal with in our life. In fact, we would never be able to escape from them because even up till today, there are many people who complains about my looks. This just proves that we will never be able to satisfy everyone and what is most important is to feel comfortable in our own skin, literally. 

There is a saying for girls "There are no ugly women on Earth, only lazy women".

You cannot expect yourself to look like a prince or Cinderella, if you do not put in any effort at all. It does not work this way man! Slowly experiment what works for you and what don't. Take it slowly and don't get too frustrated. I understand how frustrating it could be sometimes when you stare into the mirror, and you just felt so inferior about yourself when all your friends around you are looking so great. And of course, with many girl or boy suitors going after them. 

I know it, I really know how it feels. And it sucks big time!


If you guys are still feeling insecure about anything, you may always drop me a message on my Instagram, and I would be more than glad to be your Aunt Agony! When I used to go through the stage of going past my own insecurities, I have no one to talk to, and the feeling is really very miserable. 

Because I know how unbearable those feelings can be, and feeling of hopelessness, I want to do my part and be there for those teenage boys out there who are facing the same insecurities that I used to, and am still facing till today. 

Let's all be on this journey together and I hope that with my small little effort, I can make a difference in YOUR life.


Cheers and much love to all of you!

No comments:

Post a Comment